Perception versus Invention

The winter season is rolling into its full swing of control over the lives of all Canadians - throughout the country we all find ourselves huddled inside our abodes, waiting until the snow stops falling, the wind stops howling, and the cold goes away again. I while away this time working on my book, making full use of my classes, and using the moments to think. Big surprise, huh? Me thinking...will wonders ever cease. It all comes down to choices, people, it all comes down to choices. In that vein of thought, here is my thought on an important subject of personal validation. Here you go, and may you enjoy.

I sat in a class while around me a debate started to pick up minute steam...minus the students who are seemingly afraid of their own voices, and thus, never seem to place forth their thoughts for a mass forum. But me? Huh...I have never seemed to have a problem in exercising my mind and using it as it was designed - for learning, sorting, and assimilating as much information as I can possibly absorb. Just call me the Human Sponge. Anyway, I digress, and return to our topic of debate.

We were discussing the concept of how we perceive people's influence in our lives. Whether it be how they may look at us, how they may judge us, but more importantly, the persuasive tactics of significant others in our lives. The thing is people, I really do not care too much if someone does not like how I dressed myself this morning, or if I did not shave, or even if they find I talk too much. I do not live my life based on other biases and opinions nor do I feel anyone else should. If you have confidence in yourself, believe in yourself, and trust in yourself...well, the rest will follow.

An important point in the discussion was that as we grow older, our significant others become less influential to us. To me, significant others may mean my family, a mate or partner, but more specifically, it means my friends. On that note, I disagree with the idea of my friends becoming less of an imprint on my life as I grow in senescence. To me, my friends are a large piece of my personal puzzle, and they have helped me place abstract corners into slots where they never seemed to fit before. They are my confidants, they are my savior's at times, they are the ones who believe in me, and they are the ones who listen to my thoughts and concerns.

Is that to say that I place all my trust on them or want them to live my life for me? Hell no, but I do want them to see what I am accomplishing so they can revel in my glory with me. Does that mean I only run to them when I am in distress or in need of a shoulder to rest upon? Once again, hell no, because I make a point and effort to always inform my friends of their worth to me, of what they mean to me, and to the ones that have seen me through my many trials and tribulations over the years...well, you are the ones that I love to the very marrow of my bone.

So, if a significant other comments on your clothes, then smile and say thank you. If they ask how you are doing - and they are the ones whose opinion you value - then let them in to your mind and confide in your fears and desires. These are the ones who aid in shaping our lives because they are the ones who see you as the sculptor...they are the ones who will sometimes wipe the sweat of your brow when you become too intertwined in your art that you forget everything else surrounding you. I know from personal experience, people, and I know that my friends understand my love and appreciation for their contribution to my life.

So, take the time to let your real friends know that you love them. Take the time to pull them close into your arms, tell them their personal worth to you...and above all, tell them thank you. I say thank you for those who mean the most to me, the ones who have held my head up when it seemed oh so heavy, and to the ones who let me do the same for them. Pull your shoulders straight with pride, run not walk down the road of your dreams, and make sure you know it is okay to sometimes slip and fall...for there will always be someone to give you a hand in standing tall. Until we meet again, people, until we meet again.

"Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend."
-Albert Camus