Thought n. The intellectual activity or production of a particular time or group (eg. Ancient Greek thought; deconstructionist thought)
I strive to figure out what others consider normal conversation, or for that matter, what they consider normal thoughts. It seems that I am one who does not think like the normal flock, or even keep up with normal daily ins and outs. Believe me, people, it is not as if I do not want to diverge from my mind sometimes, but it just seems that when I do, it follows me like a sheep dog herding a lost stray.
I realize then, that my course is unique from the norm, and the sooner I accept it, the better off I will be. All are called but not all will answer...fine for you, but not acceptable for me. I hear the bell tolling for me to come home, and home is where my journey leads. All it takes is a little bit of time, a dash of patience, and a wanderlust for the road ahead. For an example of life within the confines of my mind, read on. Here you go, and may you enjoy.
I lay awake last night, just before I fell asleep, and listened to my thoughts. Amazingly, I could actually feel time passing; an internal clock of sorts with an inaudible tick to mark the passage. It led me to think on how I live my life, and if I am taking advantage of my daily opportunities. To be quite honest, I do not empty my waking moments of their full usage. How could I possibly do that? As it is, I am told that I think too much, that I can be too deep at times, and that I need to get out of my head at others.
There are those that look at time as the end of days, as in they finish one another off. No, I prefer to see them as new beginnings, another chance to learn, as avenues of growth, and, more importantly...times that bring me closer to the truth. For if it is not the truth you are searching for, then what is it? Why would you journey down the road, only to find fallacy in the end? Why indeed...I only know that the truth will set us free.
Locked doors can lead to open rooms, and are also chances to rest. They are pregnant with inspiration, sometimes evaluation, and are always time for preparation. I am all about my present moments, but is it so wrong to plan for my future? To imagine my life full of happiness, travel, and reaching for my full potential? So, when it all happens, I can just act surprised, even though I know everything acted accordingly to plan. I mean, why else would I invest so much time in myself, right? I do not so much aim for my mark, as much as I aim above it...that way, I am able to at least hit what I have in sight. No more; no less.
That is not to say that failure is not allowable. Actually, quite the opposite at times because the best way to learn is from our mistakes. No, it is more about how we bounce back from our failings. To not dwell on them after the fall, but, instead, to pick ourselves up, brush off the dust, and continue on. Not to repetitious, but, remember that forward progression is the only link to survival.
It is the lessons learned during transition that aid us in our journey. The end result is how we look at our passing days. Are they just a means to an end that is inevitable, building up one on top of the other? Or are they chances to build on your life and make each day better than the last? For this cat, every day brings me closer to wisdom, and, eventually, my end result. The last rung at the top of my ladder. Until we meet again, people, until we meet again.
"What I say, what I think
What I put down in ink
I'm only trying to find a way to understand
And I mean no harm
I'm just searching for calm
In the storm of mankind"
- David Gray
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